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View from the Chief’s Luau

Finding a luau in Hawaii is like finding a bad tattoo at a music festival or a fight on St. Patty’s day, you can (should?) do it with your eyes closed! There are quite a few well known ones on the west coast that have rave reviews but what stood out about the Chief’s version is that he’s the man behind the show and in the show, not just a bunch of uni students on rotation. Being able to time it with our Sealife visit helped it work out perfectly. The “then its settled” moment came when we realised he and his gang of merry men (and women) appeared on one of the legs of Amazing Race 2011 (not surprisingly one of our favourite reality tv shows 😉 ).

There are a few package deals to choose ranging from $77 to $135 for adults, the main difference being the seating areas. The selling point for the Paradise upgrade package is priority queuing for the buffet and centered table seating while the Royal Package (*snicker*) has table service and “front of house” seating. They also throw in a turtle, sharks and dolphin “mini tour” before hand but if you’re already considering going to the Sealife park this will be redundant.

So what it essentially comes down to is the type of lei you want because even though there’s roughly 3-400 people, the grouped tables with assigned seats are all arranged so viewing isn’t very difficult from any angle and its easy enough to get up and step to the side if you want to snap some photos. The priority buffet line up is unnecessary, there is literally so much food that you wont miss out on “the good stuff”. They will also announce when you are allowed to go up for seconds so the “cheap seats” are just as good if you want the experience minus the frills (or lei flowers as it were). All options however are clearly listed on the site if you feel the urge to splurge for a special occasion.

Photo tip: If you’re planning on taking a lot of photos, your choice of package will have some influence on your shots. Front seats trade close proximity for shooting angle and the ability to stand. Seats off to the side/back will require a long lens. Almost all the photos seen here were shot with a 300mm, lighting is quite dimm when you factor in the higher shutter speeds you will need to freeze the action so be prepared to push the iso.

Travel tip: If you want to save a few bucks on parking, stick to the dirt area at the front of the park near the street. Its only a short walk (about 100m) up the hill to the entrance.

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The luau conveniently starts before the park closes so there’s no waiting around if the park was first on your list. Get in early for demonstrations and interactive activities like hula lessons, headband weaving, tattooing, spear throwing and fire making. Luaus are all about song and dance and things get started accordingly. Halved whole pigs are blessed as they’re lowered into a home made hot coals pit – later to be filling our bellies!

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The ceremony starts with a traditional welcome and some light history and story of a Queen and her tribe, a theme which continues through out the night. The charismatic Chief kicks off one of many stand up, slap stick routines with his larger than life personality which basically makes learning about the island way of life like demonstrating the husking of a coconut far more interesting and funny. With a few flicks of the wrist the coconut is skinned and cracked and he’s sipping the milk from it like he just cracked a beer instead.

The break for dinner is roughly an hour or so which leaves you plenty of time to eat and digest. Compliment your meal with some cake, fruit salad or maybe a spot of spear throwing.

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The on stage entertainment continues with traditional dances from neighbouring islands, Fiji, Samoa, New Zealand and other cultures that have influenced and fused with Hawaiian culture. After this, things get “hands on” with crowd participation. I can hear all the Marge Simpson’s out there mumbling “don’t make eye contact, omg theyre interacting!!” but its not that bad. They eventually get almost everyone up on stage in one way or another, be it guys doing the Hakka or girls doing the hula. Just think of it as dancing awkwardly with your old rellys at a wedding, it might be uncomfortable at the time but you get to bring home a memorable experience. You might even score a lei (or a lay?? Ay ay 😉 😉 ) for your troubles.

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That is of course unless you are me… then things got -REALLY- interesting. I stood off to the side or at the back for a lot of the show snapping photos but that of course left me standing out like a bullseye saying “pick me for something embarrassing and slightly traumatic”. The stage was already full with audience members for a group dance so I thought they just wanted me up there to fill the last spot on the end, next thing I know I’m being whisked out the back amongst the dancers getting changed and before I could say “hey, at least buy me a drink first” I was getting donned in a grass skirt, lei and headdress with the instruction “when I say, “now” you run up on to the stage and yell out “ALOOHHAA”, then just follow the ques from the Chief. Don’t worry, you’ll be fine…. NOW!”. I didn’t even have a chance to poo my pants…

What proceeded was what seemed like an eternity (though in reality about 5min) of me making a fool of myself; getting props from fellow Aussies; quite possibly disrespecting/objectifying the tribes’ Queen and trying to learn how to hula by following fruit related commands from the Chief (apple was left hip, papaya was right etc) – all the while having to face the strikingly beautiful and scantily clad Queen and mimic her actions. Now, I lived through the 90s and am no stranger to the dance floor having conjured up a repertoire of moves from the likes of R Kelly, Janet Jackson, Johnny Gill, Vanilla Ice and EYC so I can at least move to a beat but to contort my spine in a way that even Gumby would look… Gumby? That, I could not and subsequently looked like a short circuiting C3P0 next to the hipshakin mama’s. It got worse before it got better with the rest of the dancers joining the Queen on stage and really shaming me out, thankfully by the end, the sequencing had dissolved into a freestyle circle, not so thankfully, I was still in the middle but at least now I could battle under my own terms and unleash the destructive force that is the running man!!! I believe it was purely coincidental that the music stopped at that time :p

In true (almost) nightly show fashion, the rest of the performance rolled on like clock work but my time on stage wasn’t done, they called all honeymooners and anniversary celebrators to the stage. Apart from a “you again??”, it was much more pleasant and very romantic slow dancing with my wife as the Chief serenaded us on acoustic guitar.

The night closed out with an explosive fire dance with the Chief showing his hefty frame had no hindrance on his agility or skill.

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There were high fives aplenty in the toilets afterwards, some actually thought I was part of the act. Maybe my performance didn’t completely stink… or maybe they were just “good sport”-ing me??

In short, it was easily one of the most memorable nights in Hawaii, so much so that we’ve already vowed to return for an anniversary one year. It goes without saying that we highly recommended this luau.

AALLOOOHHAAAA!

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Next up is the finale as we wind down our island getaway with a spot of sight seeing and hiking.

As always, if you have any questions about our adventures or where to buy something, just hit us up on the Soulbridge Media facebook page.

Hawaii 2012 part #1 – Arrival
Hawaii 2012 part #2 – Waikiki
Hawaii 2012 part #3 – Honolulu shopping – Part A
Hawaii 2012 part #4 – The Big Island – Volcano tour
Hawaii 2012 part #5 – Shopping Honolulu – part B
Hawaii 2012 part #6 – Tattoo Honolulu / Boardshorts: A Perfect Fit art exhibits
Hawaii 2012 part #7 – Pearl City area
Hawaii 2012 part #8 – Swap meets and Made in Hawaii festival
Hawaii 2012 part #9 – Cook offs and Car shows
Hawaii 2012 part #10 – North shore
Hawaii 2012 part #11 – Windward shore and Sealife Park
Hawaii 2012 part #12 – Chief’s Luau at Sealife Park
Hawaii 2012 part #13 – South shore – Diamondhead crater, Hanauma bay

For most, the main reason to head over to the East coast aka the Windward shore is the Kualoa Ranch movie site tour, which is a famous location for movies such as Jurassic Park and 50 First Dates. While some of the off road activities are appealing, its essentially just rain forest and grass with a few pieces of memorabilia, a far cry from a working production set some may be hoping for. There are however, plenty of other things to see and do, along with kilometers of beaches fair less busy than those on the west coast.

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Nuuanu Pali lookout

On the way to the east coast via the winding forest roads of the cross country Pali Highway, take a quick stop at the Nuuanu Pali lookout. This will help you understand why they call it the Windward shore, windward being a severe understatement! Even on an otherwise quite warm day of mid to high 20s weather it was quite cold thanks to the wind chill factor dropping temps easily by 10-15C! Needless to say, a jacket is a must, ideally a softshell will give you the most comfort and protection.

The view however is worth a short bit of discomfort overlooking the valleys towards Kaneohe and the ocean.

There is no cost for entry but there is also no free parking for tourists (locals just need to show proof of residency). The $3 fee apparently has only come about in the last couple years, its a bit of a greedyy since there’s no facilities or anything else justifying the cost for a short 15-30min visit but worth it none the less.

If you have time to kill there is a hiking path leading down from the lookout point or to make a day of it, head to near by Manoa Falls. Just be warned that the falls aren’t really falls any more after a landslide a couple years back but terrain may have once again changed since this was written.

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Byodo-in Temple

The Byodo-in Temple is a little north of Kaneohe nestled in lush rolling foothills. It is a commemorative replica of the same temple in Japan and features Japanese gardens, bridge and koi pond with literally thousands of koi carp. The place also lays its claims to fame with appearances in Hawaii 5-0 and Lost.

The grounds aren’t overly big so you wont need more than an hour of slow strolling to cover it.

Entrance fee is $3 for adults but at least here you know that money is going to the maintenance of the grounds and not pocket lining!

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Windward mall
Image courtesy of Oahu Paradise Homes

Windward mall

On the way down to Sealife park the only major shopping stop is the Windward mall. While quite sizable, there is little variation in the stores and probably for the most part can be skipped over if you already hit the big centers on the west coast. One store however that made the stop more than worthy was Sears. Normally it falls into the “killing time” category for us with its Myer/David Jones assortment of stock but this particular store was more like an outlet version with almost everything on sale or at clearance prices. Brands and content read more like parts of a Karmaloop catalogue with Dickies, Southpole, Zoo York, Levis, Lee, Carhartt and a bunch of business attire basics undoubtedly from their incorporated chain, KMart. A great stop for the ladies as well with heavily discounted underwear and swimwear.

Oh, I lied when I said there was no reason to stop.. they have a Wetzel’s Pretzels 😉

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Sea Life Park

Sea Life Park made the list for two main reasons, swimming with the dolphins and the Chief’s Luau.

The almost obligatory claim to fame is 50 First Dates – seriously that movie is like a walking billboard for Tourism Hawaii! There were no penguins in Hawaiian shirts but the dolphin we swam with was in the movie! Real down to earth guy too, you wouldn’t pick it from the obnoxious character he plays on screen 😉

– Dolphin swimming
Want to mingle with celebrities? Well you know you gotta drop some coin to let them know how you roll! Luckily costs are available on their website and you don’t need to leave a Benjamin for the “help”. Take your swim wear, cos, you know, you’ll be swimming (more like wading and fighting the powerful currents stirred up from the dophin’s wake). There are a couple change room areas, there’s even one in the briefing area so you don’t have to arrive in your swim gear. The staff along with a short video will explain everything pretty clearly and there’s really not much else to it.

Travel tip: A note to those with piercings, you will be asked to remove them so if you have a face full of metal you may want to get a start on that before hand. Girls, if you have something like a belly button ring, wearing a one piece may help you avoid having to remove it, but they are very strict and rightly so to protect ocean friends.

Photo tip: since you cant take anything into the pool, let alone a camera, photos are taken by staff and sold at the usual exuberant theme park prices. The shots look like they’re taken on full auto, with no colour correction which leaves you looking a nice shade of sea sick green! So its best to get someone in your group that isn’t swimming to snap some shots for you (or maybe sweet talk a stranger into emailing some to you). Spectators are free to move around outside of the barrier so a good angle wont be too hard to find.

The rest of the park houses the usual aquatic life from small tanked fish and sea life to large compounds with seals and penguins.

If you purchased one of the value combo deals which includes the Chief’s Luau, its just a short walk from the gift shop. Those hip shaking good times are up next!

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As always, if you have any questions about our adventures or where to buy something, just hit us up on the Soulbridge Media facebook page.

Hawaii 2012 part #1 – Arrival
Hawaii 2012 part #2 – Waikiki
Hawaii 2012 part #3 – Honolulu shopping – Part A
Hawaii 2012 part #4 – The Big Island – Volcano tour
Hawaii 2012 part #5 – Shopping Honolulu – part B
Hawaii 2012 part #6 – Tattoo Honolulu / Boardshorts: A Perfect Fit art exhibits
Hawaii 2012 part #7 – Pearl City area
Hawaii 2012 part #8 – Swap meets and Made in Hawaii festival
Hawaii 2012 part #9 – Cook offs and Car shows
Hawaii 2012 part #10 – North shore
Hawaii 2012 part #11 – Windward shore and Sealife Park
Hawaii 2012 part #12 – Chief’s Luau at Sealife Park
Hawaii 2012 part #13 – South shore – Diamondhead crater, Hanauma bay

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Home to any number of clichés, movies, tv shows and the stereotypical surfer lifestyle is Hawaii’s North shore with rolling waves on one side and lush rainforests on the other.

Getting there
Its not particularly a long drive with an average car run taking under an hour but it really depends on the traffic which can go from “Sunday drive” to “LA peak hour” depending on the time of day/year.

There’s a couple different routes you can take which are about the same travel time.
The H2 to route 803 is the gps choice, you could try the 99 on the way back but you may get stuck with some local traffic on the smaller roads. Take the 750 if you’re up for the scenic route.

Travel tip: If you’re venturing up during the cooler months when the surfing comps are on, be prepared for ultimate chaos and getting no where fast..slowly!

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North Shore Locale

Haleiwa – Is the major town in the area which you’ll see coming over the mountain range. Its pretty much a blip on the map but hosts more than enough amenities for tourists and locals alike with food, souvenir and surf stores dominating the landscape. This however isn’t the only stop for services, there are plenty of other places and road side vendors along the coast line.

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Bay – One of the most popular beaches in the area which means parking can sometimes be a pain during the day. Later in the afternoon sees the crowds die off
Falls Park – Is the national park home to gardens, hiking paths and even craft demos. Cost is $24 and opening/closing times vary from day to day so check the website
Valley – If you’re lucky enough to catch a sunset with some drama, this is the place to be. Sadly not the case for us!

Pupukea beach, Sunset beach, Turtle bay beach, Laniakea beach and Sharks Cove are all roughly linked together and continue up the coast line so there’s plenty to choose from when you are looking for a spot to beach, relax or swim/surf. Plenty of rock pools crop up at low tide as well which will help with interesting photos (if you have the sky to match).

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Travel tip: Don’t let the scheduled daily afternoon sun showers deter you, they clear as quickly as they come, just keep a brolly handy or be within dashing distance to your car if you’ve set up a picnic.

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As always, if you have any questions about our adventures or where to buy something, just hit us up on the Soulbridge Media facebook page.

Hawaii 2012 part #1 – Arrival
Hawaii 2012 part #2 – Waikiki
Hawaii 2012 part #3 – Honolulu shopping – Part A
Hawaii 2012 part #4 – The Big Island – Volcano tour
Hawaii 2012 part #5 – Shopping Honolulu – part B
Hawaii 2012 part #6 – Tattoo Honolulu / Boardshorts: A Perfect Fit art exhibits
Hawaii 2012 part #7 – Pearl City area
Hawaii 2012 part #8 – Swap meets and Made in Hawaii festival
Hawaii 2012 part #9 – Cook offs and Car shows
Hawaii 2012 part #10 – North shore
Hawaii 2012 part #11 – Windward shore and Sealife Park
Hawaii 2012 part #12 – Chief’s Luau at Sealife Park
Hawaii 2012 part #13 – South shore – Diamondhead crater, Hanauma bay

Ala Moana Shopping Centre

If shopping is low on your list of priorities but you still want to venture out then Ala Moana is the one stop you should make, if you’re a shopaholic then it’s a good first stop to gauge prices and what’s available. Even better, it opens early and closes late.

The short of it, the place is huge. A mostly open aired multi-storey arrangement is home to nearly 300 stores so you’ll need a good couple hours even if you are moving at a moderate pace. In list form our picks of the bunch would be:

Animation Addict
– A good place to start if you’re after Hello Kitty, Tokidoki or Angry Birds. They also have a good selection of Domo and the more popular items like Pop! Vinyl collectibles and Marvel merch. While most items are readily available just about everywhere, there were a few gems like a limited edtion Hello Kitty x Wish Come True collab bag. You know its scarce when even the staff at the Sanrio store have never seen one before!

Animation Addict

Animation Addict

Animation Addict

Animation Addict

Animation Magic – An alterntive to Animation Addict quite possibly own by the same mob as the stock was very similar
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Pac Sun – Local surf and skate store. Generous mix of designer and run of the mill wear with a few things on sale.
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Crazy shirts
– A Hawaii staple for tees. Its where you go if you want a souvenir shirt that isn’t from an ABC store. Shirts are good quality with a variety of themes, mostly surf/native based however the bump in price ($15-40) may have you heading back to the markets for a 5 for $20 deal.

Lego store – Doesn’t matter where we are in the world, if there’s a Lego store close by, we’re stopping in! This one had a nice bunch of dioramas built around different themes, the half size R2D2 and very large Star Wars star destroyer in the window were quite impressive. An instant souvenir was the minifig’ and Lego tag “I <3 Hawaii" keyring, shame these weren't available in other cities we've been to. [caption id="attachment_2882" align="alignnone" width="550"]Lego Store Lego Store[/caption]

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And of course you cant go past the American shopping mall staples – Champs, Footlocker, Hot Topic, Lids, Vans, Journeys, local surf/ski store Local Motion and cutesy overload is never too far away with Sanrio which seems to have signed a deal with the whole state as it and its associated local related merchandise is everywhere, they’re even in ABC stores! Just try to hold back a “nawwww” when you see a brown Hello Kitty in a grass skirt, its impossible! @~@

Pit stop time, roll out the pretzels! Unfortunately without a Wetzel‘s in sight we had to settle for Pretzelmaker. Not quite the same but tasty nonetheless (and still a damn sight better than anything on the streets of NYC! Yes, I realise using anything “from the streets of NYC” as a benchmark is a lazy and bias comparison :p)

One of the best things about Ala Moana is, it is central to a lot of other shops and eating spots, even better if you’re on foot, they’re all near each other and all buses lead to “Rome”.

Head out towards Nordstrom and you’ll come across three of Hawaii’s premium streetwear and sneaker boutique stores Kicks Hawaii, Noteworthy and Fitted all within a short distance of each other.

Kicks Hawaii (or KICKS HI – I know, sounds like a chorus line in Can can mode) – Is your one stop shop for sneakers and streetwear, very much in the vein of Kicks Tokyo, Undefeated and Dave’s Quality Meats. Prices are what you’d expect from such places but with limited edition prints and stock that wasn’t available on the website its a worthy tax for the “souvenir for someone who hates souvenirs”. I even spotted an unreleased ACG sneaker behind the counter which looked like a Terra Humara with “Powerlines”. Speaking to the owner it turns out we were both fans of rugged ACG’s but being a sample he quickly rejected my request to buy it :p Not being released for at least another six months didn’t help my case either!

They also regularly come by plenty of Quickstrikes so if you’re in the area for more than a week, it might be worth a return visit. You can keep up to date with their blog here.

Noteworthy – Is quite the illusive store if you’re on the same block as the store. It’s actually on the second level with access up an old flight of stairs behind the shop fronts, which you can only really see if you’re on the other side of the road. These guys are more along the lines of higher end street fashion. If you’ve ever had a penchant for $100 flannies, pants with the bottoms rolled past your ankles or have ever been referred to as a hipster then this is the place for you. Prices were well in the “you’re kiddin’ right?” range but they did have plenty of items heavily reduced on sale to help minimise that instant buyers’ remorse feeling.

Noteworthy

Noteworthy



Fitted
– Very much like Lids but swap the run of the mill colours and teams for limited edition colours and exclusive branded designs along with their in house branding. Staff were very friendly and helpful, they even went to the extent of cracking open new, yet to be released stock a couple months early for me. Easy decision then 😉
Fitted

Fitted

Crooks and Castles is also in the area, a couple doors down from Noteworthy in all of its clinic white glory but very same-same stock. We recommend sticking to online dealers like Karmaloop where this brand is always on sale.

A couple other mentions in the area are Walmart – come on, you’re in the ‘States, its pretty much a tourist attraction even if its just for “The people of Walmart“. It’s also a good stop if you’re after some cheap clothing/beach wear basics.

Morning glory
is just across the road, yep, the one and the same that used to be in almost every shopping centre around Brisbane and the original cutesy Asian toy and knick knack chain. If you’re after plushes or stationary along these lines then it doesn’t disappoint – a huge range of items from little phone trinkets right up to bean bag sized Totoros.

Morning Glory

Morning Glory

..And with that, we’ll hit the pause button on this epic day of deep tissue retail therapy and insert a day volcano hunting at the biggest island in Hawaii’s chain of island, aptly called… The Big Island.

Hawaii 2012 part #1 – Arrival
Hawaii 2012 part #2 – Waikiki
Hawaii 2012 part #3 – Honolulu shopping – Part A
Hawaii 2012 part #4 – The Big Island – Volcano tour
Hawaii 2012 part #5 – Shopping Honolulu – part B
Hawaii 2012 part #6 – Tattoo Honolulu / Boardshorts: A Perfect Fit art exhibits
Hawaii 2012 part #7 – Pearl City area
Hawaii 2012 part #8 – Swap meets and Made in Hawaii festival
Hawaii 2012 part #9 – Cook offs and Car shows
Hawaii 2012 part #10 – North shore
Hawaii 2012 part #11 – Windward shore and Sealife Park
Hawaii 2012 part #12 – Chief’s Luau at Sealife Park
Hawaii 2012 part #13 – South shore – Diamondhead crater, Hanauma bay

05.08.2013
Waikiki Beach

Waikiki Beach

Having Chilli’s Bar and Grill on the ground floor of our hotel was one way to welcome us back to American food culture, tantalisingly delish but instantly regrettable. Luckily there was plenty of walking to be had around our new temporary home to help move along the couple pounds of meat, cheese and grease we had just ingested.

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Waikiki is pretty much the Oahu equivalent of Surfers Paradise, ie. tourist central, but its not all bad! Street botherers and slow moving path blocking groups aside, between the scores of hotels there is a generous speckling of retail shops and eateries. Kuhio Ave is a good place to start with the Waikiki town center, Kings Village shopping center, Royal Hawaiian center. Here you’ll find almost any souvenir you can imagine with the usual excessive over redundancy of content and shops in tourist hot spots but it is still worth a look-through as some stores will stock different designs, colours or styles. The fixed shops make way for open air markets and mobile stalls in surrounding lanes and streets, thankfully very few are pushy with their sales.

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The Royal Hawaiian is where the branded shopping begins with high end names like Fendi, Hermes, Bvlgari and even a Ferrari store but the one we were most interested in was Zumies – the token skate, surf, snow, moto-x store. They actually had quite the range of stock and brands, even a small section of Undefeated along with a bunch of sale items, always a good sign (:
Downstairs, it wouldn’t hurt your taste buds to pop into the Honolulu Cookie Company and try a few samples of their gourmet shortbread cookies.

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Out on the streets you’ll find a couple 88 tees stores – kind of a designer vintage tee store dressed up like a rubbishy clearance store where shirts are in piles on large tables and in pigeon holes. There were some cool designs but prices were quite expensive for what they were (starting around $20). They did however have some other random items like old Hawaiian and American licence plates which were great for a slightly quirky souvenir (:

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Alot of the high end stores made use of their massive store fronts for some intriguing art exhibits.

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Finally, if by some chance you were walking around with your eyes closed, you may not have noticed that there’s quite literally an ABC store on every corner (not be mistaken with the Japanese Footlocker equivalent). Basically your one stop shop for souvenirs, convenience items and last minute life saving.

Next up, we take our best shot contracting mall dementia by running the gauntlet of the major shopping centres on the west coast… all in one day!

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Hawaii 2012 part #1 – Arrival
Hawaii 2012 part #2 – Waikiki
Hawaii 2012 part #3 – Honolulu shopping – Part A
Hawaii 2012 part #4 – The Big Island – Volcano tour
Hawaii 2012 part #5 – Shopping Honolulu – part B
Hawaii 2012 part #6 – Tattoo Honolulu / Boardshorts: A Perfect Fit art exhibits
Hawaii 2012 part #7 – Pearl City area
Hawaii 2012 part #8 – Swap meets and Made in Hawaii festival
Hawaii 2012 part #9 – Cook offs and Car shows
Hawaii 2012 part #10 – North shore
Hawaii 2012 part #11 – Windward shore and Sealife Park
Hawaii 2012 part #12 – Chief’s Luau at Sealife Park
Hawaii 2012 part #13 – South shore – Diamondhead crater, Hanauma bay